Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Back like I left something....


Because everyday is a new day,


that we've never seen before

Every day is a new start..... 

I know the beginning of the New Year is symbolic for most of us,
a time to change what needs to be changed and fix what needs to be fixed, 
but really each and everyday we should have a resolution and work towards becoming better.
Another year has passed us by, and many of us are complaining about what DID not happen in our favor. 
But I think we need to realize that we have already been blessed with favor because we are still alive to see a New 
Year!

We have another CHANCE! 

Infact, we are blessed with a new CHANCE everyday we wake up!

So, promise me this..... no more complaining, no more procrastinating, no more putting your time or energy into 
people or situations that you KNOW are a waste....and trust me, you KNOW who and what are wastes!

Be safe, Be aware, Be Open MInded, UNDERSTAND and be thankful :)

-Love Always, Jhene :-*

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Honestly....


I turned off the light

Hoping I could see my thoughts more clearly

Without the light

I look in the mirror and see me more clearly

I am here in this moment

Listening to Nami breathe

Realizing Im not who I claim to be

I take pride in knowing  my potential

Yet, take no initiative to fulfill all that I am capable of being and doing

God is said to be the Ground Of Being…..

I say He is the Ground Of Doing

Doing what is right…..

Doing what you want

In a respectful, righteous manner

I am currently what I do

And based on those things...

I am not the being I want to be

But I know my potential

Afraid of my potential?

Maybe

Or possibly

It’s afraid of me

And sometimes I say these things just to be poetic

Without believing a thing

A friend once told me, regarding poetry…

“Be as  honest as possible”

In that moment

I realized

I couldnt be...

If so, 

It wouldnt be me


And this is my first

Transitional piece

from lies to honesty

Honest Poetry .

...................

The Fire



 

When I was in the second grade

My grandmother picked me up from school early

She told me something had happened to the house

The house that we had just moved in

With the big living room and bay window

Still undecorated…unfurnished

Not enough time to make too many memories

But in an instant we lost so many……..

Except I remember that’s where I learned to ride a bike

Without training wheels

Then rode it down the hill one day

And ran into a parked car!

And I had my own room…with a big closet

Id pretend it was a small restaurant and serve tea and cookies to my toys J

I thought it was a mansion….

I remember the garden out of a fairy tale

An old well with a tree growing from it

A small library and even a bar

Mommy’s room had carpet in the bathroom

I though that was strange

And an “Island kitchen”

I loved that name

The fire trucks

The charcoal smell

Waiting in the neighbors house

Thinking we’d be able to go back home

Still waiting in the neighbors house

Wondering….when we’d go back home

 

 

They saved all they could, but there wasn’t much

No clothes, no shoes, no toys

All baby pictures …….gone forever

But my sisters who were in the house that day

They were ok….

so it was ok

Maybe I was too young to realize the magnitude

Of all that was lost in the fire

The few memories we had made….

The numerous memorabilia that had been taken away

 And all that was lost in the fire

My mother was so calm as I can remember

Our dream home gone before we could truly enjoy it

We moved into a hotel room

5 kids and 2 parents …. 1 hotel room

One new cotton sweat suit and pair of white shoes for the each of us

And through it all I remember being happy  and seeing my mother smile

We lost it all in the fire

But still, all was not lost in the fire

 

(November 16, 2008)

Thursday, October 22, 2009

Long Time!!

Hope everyone is doing great!!

 I am :)

Will be blogging more soon ...

Just wanted to say

Hi!


Thursday, October 1, 2009

.....

finally.


mutuality.

compatibility.
 


:)

Happy.

Bye !

Saturday, September 5, 2009

Peace Out

Going back into my shell
Cuz out here it's like hell
- can't deal with all the faulty people and the lies they tell
So
Here's your cake.... 
But u can't eat it,
There's my heart....
But you can't beat it,
And You can keep it.
I don't need it....
Where I'm goin,We don't feel.....
We only think it.

Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

A Mother's Love


(What's between the lines is really important in this one. Enjoy. Relate. Comment :) 
Today I deleted your number from my phone
I planned to erase the memories,
'Til I realized there were none
I've BEEN use to your absence...
So It didn't make a difference,
So there's really nothing missin...

Ur not necessarily a necessity
And honestly,

I was doing YOU a favor

I can tell the whole world 
Of our disqualifications as a man
I can list hundreds before you
That have done what you can't
I can call u out by government name
And have u admitted
(cuz ur ass is insane!)

But that would mean I actually cared,
as if there were somethin we actually shared,
So, I'll leave u with 
a prayer instead...

* A prayer for you:
And the others who....
Thrive on your misery

Blessed be your health,
Wishes for wealth,
And love for your self
You'll need it

The blood we share,

I'll bleed it

But you'll never have my tears
You'll never know my fears....

Cuz you never got to know me
After 21 years.

And in your darkest days
Maybe you'll ponder
You'll think of ur fuck ups...

Maybe you'll wonder

Or maybe you'll still be ignorant 
as the day you were born.

As for me,
I'll never be torn

U have to have a PLACE in a heart, 
In order to break it....
And for as long as I can remember,
That place has been vacant

Love alone is never enough
Unless ofcourse...its a Mother's Love 

Sunday, August 30, 2009

screw you for the confusion....thank you for the inspiration....



so sue me!
for not being a mystery
wearing my heart on my sleeve,
and my thoughts in my speech
so hate me!
for being so free
and loving so hard
without hardly knowing a thing...
And take me to prison!
for giving benefits of doubt
and being transparent
turning inside to out
Just kill me!
For wanting
that someone or something
that I've been deserving
but I'm always hurting
Cuz I'm such a dumby
So SUE me!


Love @ first fight...

when u told me you hate me,

and pushed me and shouted,

that no one would  date me,

then threw me on the ground 

and kissed me with passion

the ceiling was spinning,

the rugs left their rashes....

put it  all in your hands

as I prayed for my life,

and I hated u that  night

it was love @ first sight












*no, i have never been hit by a man before....

this is just a poem....*

Friday, August 14, 2009

Here's a bitter/sweet story about a man....


he met his soulmate over the internet.....

.fell in love with pictures and texts...

in love with a girl that may not even exist, 

Whom he may never get to hold or kiss.

she'll always be something for him to miss.....


but @tleast for the moment what he feels is real


and he smiles and laughs and dreams of her

and writes songs he wishes to sing to her

and though she may be an imaginary friend

she made him feel alive again


Love is still Love,


EVEN when......


There's no one on the other end

True Story

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

CLOSE YOUR EYES....


and walk outside 


in the middle of the night

in the middle of the street

in the summer's heat

and just go.....

will u die?

survive?

nobody knows....

it won't make a difference

just keep ur eyes closed.

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

kinda funny

........

This is the realest shit I ever wrote....


"All of the "Greats" die lonely...becuz they never received from anyone...what they gave to the World... their all

  1. And if tomorrow were my last   day....
    somebody better call me great."

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

BAsically....

I have a lot of pictures and  I don't know what to do with them!!.... so, making and sharing slideshows seem like a good idea :) 


THANKS PHOTOBUCKET!

Here are the pictures from the LAker Parade :)


OK SO>>>>

My mom just gave me these pictures from about 3 YEARS AGO! lol... So I decided to share them with you :)


As some of you may know...I was home schooled or on "Independent Study" since my 7th Grade year....meaning I did not go to a traditional high school..... I went to City of Angels (indpt. study). 

 most Independent Study schools, (if any) do NOT have sports teams, clubs, dances, and all that other HIgh School stuff... therefore they don't have PROM either! BUT MY AMAZING MOTHER decided to put together a PROM just for ME for my last year in HIGH SCHOOL! it was great! 

We took pictures had a karaoke party for our "after prom" and the whole nine! OUR OWN PERSONAL PROM! 

and this is why my mom is the best :)

Here our some of the pictures...lol.


Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Just thought I'd share....

Jhene Chilombo

Professor Leonard

English 102

3 June 2007                                                                                    

               


     “I Shall Paint My Nails Red” by Carole Satyamurti and “The Secretary Chant” by Marge Piercy are two poems that reflect how women can feel unappreciated. These two poems explore the thoughts of  two women who have let their jobs and nail polish define them. In “The Lesson” by Toni Cade Bambara, there is a woman who has benefitted from letting her surroundings define her and there is also a little girl who may or may not benefit from the older women and the lessons she teaches her. I was inspired by these two plays and short story to write a short story of my own about a women who lives a quiet life, but is still as important as any other women, as any other person....


She Is



     She was hard to pick out of a crowd, never the life of any party. She didn't have the the long, flowing hair her mother had or the brains of her father. Breezed through college with As,Bs, and Cs, she never found use for her degree in business.  She was a simple woman with a simple life. No brothers. No sisters. No aunts or uncles. One child. One cat. One deceased husband who she mourned for the first 5 years then proceeded on with her own life. She hardly wore makeup, but when she did it was the same burgundy lipstick and peach,Covergirl blush. The make up didn’t make her look any different. A woman of few words, her handful of friends call her a real class act, but strangers never noticed. She didn’t want recognition or fame for her accomplishments, and she never made me clean my room. She always smelled of lavender and vanilla, but you’d never know unless you got real close to her. When she laughed it was quiet and easy and when she cried there was no sound, just tears. 


     “She was a nice lady” a neighbor says after the pastor invites people up to speak. There would only be two other people after him. A sixty-year-old life and only 10 people at a funeral to say good-bye. Besides myself, most of them were strangers, I’d seen a couple only a few times in my entire life. No one really cried out loud, the service was only 46 minutes. Another life that came and went without many people noticing. Another woman who achieved life, but went without any praise or recognition. I stood before the small crowd and shed only a single tear. “She did not live her life out loud, but that does not mean she was not here. Because of her, I am, and because of me, she is.”

Monday, June 15, 2009

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TUPAC!!



June 16th, 1971
THE WORLD'S GREATEST OF ALL TIME WAS BORN!!
He would have been 38 today...
This is the ONLY man I've ever been and will ever be a stone cold CRAZY FANATIC about.
Not only was Tupac an incredible rapper he was an amazing writer, poet, actor and philanthropist.
Its sorta strange to people when I tell them Mr. Shakur is my #1 inspiration, but in my opinion he is the epitome of an entertainer and activist! He had the charisma to draw you in, the talent to make you listen and the intelligence to teach you a thing or two! !!! 
He was VERY misunderstood, but when you really dig into his career...his poetry....his books... he rivals with Einstein in MY OPINION!!
Worlds cant express how MAD I get when I realize I will never be able to meet him!! BUT I listen to him almost everyday and collect tons of Tupac memorabilia! lol

I can go on and on.... but I will end on this note:
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TUPAC!! UR A TRUE INSPIRATION !!
T.H.U.G L.I.F.E !! (The Hate U Give Little Infants Fucks Everyone) !!!



(umm...can I nominate myself to be that person?!! lol)

Thursday, June 11, 2009

iWrite

                                                                                                                                        

Jhene Chilombo

Professor Bailey-Hoffman

English 127

10 September 2008

  Genre Exercise

     

     The text that I chose to change into another genre is the poem “Life is Fine” by Langston Hughes:

   

 I went down to the river,

I set down on the bank.

I tried to think but couldn't,

So I jumped in and sank.

I came up once and hollered!

I came up twice and cried!

If that water hadn't a-been so cold

I might've sunk and died.

 But it was      Cold in that water!      It was cold!

I took the elevator

Sixteen floors above the ground.

I thought about my baby

And thought I would jump down.

I stood there and I hollered!

I stood there and I cried!

If it hadn't a-been so high

I might've jumped and died.

  But it was      High up there!      It was high!

So since I'm still here livin',

I guess I will live on.

I could've died for love--

But for livin' I was born

Though you may hear me holler,

And you may see me cry--

I'll be dogged, sweet baby,

If you gonna see me die.

   Life is fine!      Fine as wine!      Life is fine!

 

 

I chose to change this poem into a short story with the same title and a similar message.

 

Life is Fine

 

        It was very cold that day, even though the sun was shining. Sarah woke up sooner than she had planned. The empty bottle of sleeping pills and Tequila stared her in the face as she opened her eyes. She tried to force herself back to sleep, but the vomit rising in her throat wouldn’t allow it. With all the blinds drawn in her tiny apartment it was impossible to tell what time of day it was. Sarah could care less. “I wonder if I just lay here on my back while I throw up…choke on my own vomit like Jimi Hendrix...maybe that’ll work,” Sarah thought to herself. She chuckled at how crude she could be and the vomit succeeded. The phone rang and she stumbled towards the bathroom. It had probably been ringing all morning. Probably her mother calling to say “Happy Birthday.”

 

     October 16th, Sarah’s 27th birthday and the day she would have liked to be her death day. “I’ve still got time,” she figured. Sarah looked at the hair dryer and then the tub thinking how poetic it would be to be found that way; lifeless in a warm bubble bath. But it wasn’t “bad ass” enough for her. She always considered herself to be a “bad ass”, a real rebel without a  cause.

 

     “Why would you give me such a boring name like, Sarah?” she asked her mother once when she was 16. She never thought Sarah was an edgy enough name for her. “Roxanne,” she said out loud as she stood and looked in the mirror, “I should have been a Roxanne.”

 

      The phone rang again and this time she had a feeling it was him. The same “him” who the night before she’d caught having sex with her best friend. She couldn’t allow herself to answer the phone. She swore she would never be like her mother and let a man like her father run over her and ultimately ruin her entire existence. “They all leave eventually,” Sarah thought to her self the night before as she swallowed the poisons that were to end her so-called misery.  He had been the father she never wanted, but always needed. And she had given in to love, in which she always thought to be a lie.

 

     The little piece of paper that would have been her last testimony to her family and friends was neatly folded at the end of her bed. Sarah couldn’t understand why her attempt had failed, “A fucking waste of paper,” she said to herself. She opened up the note:

 

To whom it may concern,

This will be the last time I cry; the last time I put my all into a lie.

I cant take the pain of a love lost…a love never had….the story of my life.

Goodbye.

  

     She laughed out loud. “What a fucking maniac I am!” As she looked down at her ring finger where the engagement ring he had given her had been, she wondered what she had done with it in her drunken state the night before. Her eyes began to tear. In her little apartment with vomit all over her bed spread on her 27th birthday, she was alone. She walked to the kitchen to grab a knife. “I’ve seen this in a movie once…it’s a sure thing,” she thought. Upon opening up the silverware drawer she saw that there were no clean knives. “FUCK!” she screamed. It wasn’t suppose to be this hard to kill yourself. If only she had gotten her firearm license like she had planned, she could have shot herself and went out in true “bad ass” fashion. She had planned on buying a gun, she had planned on getting a skull tattoo on her breast and she had planned on skydiving one day. But Sarah never got around to any of those things. Instead she lead a very safe life. Sarah was just a “Sarah” .Not quite the rebel she thought she was. And maybe that was the reason she was alive today.

 

     As she lay on the cold kitchen floor she suddenly felt awake. She was alive. She was suppose to be dead today, but she was alive! Her doorbell rang. “Great,” she said. “Happy Birthday my love,” her mother sang, bursting through the door. “Well! It looks like you celebrated early huh?!”  Sarah ran to the toilet to dispose of what would be the last of her vomit. “My dear! Its 3pm! Open these blinds and lets get the day started!” Sarah wiped the throw up from her mouth and sat on the edge of her bed. “Looks like you’ve had a rough night,” her mother laughed. Sarah just looked at her and couldn’t help but smile. She paused for a moment to decide whether or not she’d tell her mom about all that had happened the night before. Perhaps she’d show her the suicide note, or explain what she had been through the previous night. But instead, she smiled and didn’t say a word.

 

     She stood up to open the blinds as her mother had ordered. Sarah listened as her mother talked loudly about something Sarah was obviously not paying attention to. As she looked out the window she realized, even though it was cold that day…the sun was shining and her life was just fine.

 

Sunday, June 7, 2009

I LOVE Zoe....


“ON HER OWN SEXY CONFIDENCE:” 

“Look at me. I’m skinny, I have a big nose, no tits and no ass, but in a room full of beautiful women, I would still leave with the most gorgeous guy.”
Couldnt have said it better myself :)

Friday, June 5, 2009

*Note to self*



IT GETS WAAAAY WORSE, before it gets ANY better.

just take a deep breath, bear it...and smile.

we're gonna get through this :)

Sayonara ;)




Thursday, June 4, 2009

2am

I want to smile @ Strangers


and laugh w/ Danger

Befriend and put an end to Anger...

Break the chains,

and chase away Doubt

Run nude around the city and shout...

"FREE LOVE!"

"FREE LOVE!"

"FREE LOVE!"

Its being held captive by 

The thieves of.....

Compassion

And they want a Ransom

But Im not understandin

Cuz ALL LOVE is FREE LOVE

in its truest Fashion!


And If you're gonna LOVE

I mean, really, TRULY  LOVE...

than you gotta BE LOVE,

BE FREE, LOVE!

FREE LOVE!



~The Lotus



Wednesday, June 3, 2009

My fellow Genius Pisces said...

"Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted. "




-Albert Einstein
(i LOVE him!)



ok, goodnight 4real this time! :-)

The Chilombos....

We're so Chill




IT'S UNREAL! 

:)

nighty night.

!

:-/

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Now, I understand...

I'm not a morning person....

I'm not a day person...

and lately

I'm not a night person either

I'm beginning to think...

I'm not a person @ all



Sunday, May 31, 2009

I got the Juice NOW Homie.... lol

I Love this Scene




"I am crazy....but u kno wat else?? I don't give a fuck"
lol . Classic.

Friday, May 29, 2009

NOTHING is Original....



I hope ur listening....

because I'm only talking to you....





I'm such a fair person.... so should I just let someone else experience the joy of getting what they want.... 

Since I never get what I want.... hmmmm??? @tleast SOMEONE will be happy.....right?

I mean, not that I'm NOT happy..... I've learned to be content with whatever I have and/or don't have.....



Anyways, I hope you keep talking..... cuz I'm the only one listening.



Thursday, May 28, 2009

Twitter me this...

Latest: A Wise man once told me, 

"Like the people, Who like you" 

Sure the thrill of the chase is fun,

But when u find 'em,

You won't have 2 chase The ONE.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

CONGRATS!....


TO ADRIANA LIMA!!! The  most beautiful model...(in my opinion....no homo..lol) has confirmed that she is PREGNANT! 




She'll be joining the MILF CLUB soon!! YAY! 

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

One more thing b4 i go to sleep....

& When I cant sleep....


I think of that one time


it was you,

and me.

and then you,

then I,

and we...

:) 

Remember?




good.night

MILOSH

This is one of those songs I  put on repeat and fall asleep to...and wake up to 


Makes me want to fall  in love....lol.

THIS is a perfect song... may not be what ur into....but I freakin LOVE IT! :) 


Sunday, May 24, 2009



Saturday, May 23, 2009

Friday, May 22, 2009

Please Excuse my French


And everytime I tell myself, I'll give u a chance to do the right thing....u go a head and fuck it up.





Wats more pathetic than a man w/out a plan?  A girl who thinks  She can change him

 
..........
 

Id rather die alone and in the cold, 
Than die in the bed with a man and all the lies he's told 

FML? 
No 
FYL! 

(its not that ur  a bad person....ur just not good for me)

Sigh. 

Happy Friday

(so I decided to just keep some key points and erase all the other stuff, since I'm getting hate mail from "anonymous" people...lol.)

But thanks for the kind words to everyone who got to read the full version :)
 

Live and let Live
Get what u give....
and Karma?
Yea, she's a bitch.....
So, Watch ya self kids ;)

Thursday, May 21, 2009

Today I've reached my boiling point......

& by the end of the day, 

I will make some big decisions
& I vow not to regret ANYTHING I'm about to do

TUNNEL VISION


peace :-*

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Whatever u want it to mean :)


life is way too short to play games and be fake.

thats why I do what I feel in the moment

and Im never afraid to make a mistake

and im never afraid to feel what Im feeling

and Im never stingy with my love and affection

I'll be a Loser

I'll take that L

I'll be an L7...lol (if ur slow, thats a square)

I'll tell you "I Love You" if I feel like I love you

Y do I have to be crazy because I feel like 

I love you

You must not know what that statement means....

Its not that deep...or serious (Puh- Leeeaase!)

I didnt say I wanna marry you, or die with u, or anything!! 

I didnt even say anything!

ChillOut!

Cuz i'm Chill now

(meaning, "im cool"  "im good" "no thank u")


I'm not crazy 

Ur crazy

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

I dont feel like writing right now....

So here: 



Monday, May 18, 2009

NOW SEE >>>>



I'm not into cars and clothes, material things or name brand anything..... but THIS my friends .... is a BEAUTY!! 

Sorta reminds me of myself....very small, not too flashy, very classy....lmao